If people are stresssed who can afford to "hire a housekeeper, a doula, a mother’s helper, a dog walker", how the hell do you think parents working two jobs just to make ends meet are handling it all? "...Figure out what you can do and afford, even if it’s 40 dollars to drop your laundry off and have it returned folded once every two weeks." Forty dollars for people struggling to survive is food on the table. This article is clearly not addressing the reality of the working class, and if you can afford to hire help, stop your goddamn whining.
Having and raising kids is not easy but I personally am sick and tired of this type of post where the parent feels that parenting is a monumental challenge that overwhelms and depresses. STOP!!! I believe that these people were depressive to begin with, therefore they should seriously consider whether having children in the first place otherwise they will be pushed over the edge. I am 50 and see the younger moms whining and complaining but I guess that's the fruit of helicopter parenting, these women can't cope with the pressure and stress of parenting. Can you imagine what THEIR kids are going to be like? God help us!!!
"If we can start normalizing these feelings..."
Secretly crying hysterically alone in the bathroom is not normal. A tribe won't solve that. See a therapist.
I thought the whole article was dumb. I kept reading it being like, what is the secret we're all hiding??? 🤔 My six-year-old has the biggest attitude I have ever seen and sometimes she frustrates me SO BAD with her smug, smartassed, backtalking that I wanna throttle her a la Homer Simpson SO BAD that I have gone to the bathroom crying because I'm literally that frustrated. I didn't know that these feelings of frustration were a secret...my friends, hubby, and I, etc talk pretty openly about it! 😂
This is exactly why I will never have children unless i feel we can afford the type of support we would need. Everyone doesn't need to have kids and I 100% believe too many people who simply shouldn't have them are the main ones popping them out
Well, if I wasn't already on the fence about having children... 🤷🏻♀️Why do so many people seem to say how hard parenting is and how it can ruin your life but then seem so sorry for people who don't have kids? Do they just want others to wallow with or is it really not as bad as they say??
You want to go back to having a village help raise your child? Stop being defensive and offended when someone corrects your child! Kids are running things nowadays and everyone's afraid to correct and be firm with them. It used to be that a neighbor or even a stranger could correct a child and the parent supported that rather than being offended.
My husband and I haven't even conceived our children yet and they're already on my last damn nerve.
The point made in this article about how we are overwhelmed due to our lack of tribe is so disappointingly demonstrated throughout these comments. Parents are stuck in an unwinnable situation where they put so much pressure on themselves in order to be the highest quality parent they can be. And then when an author identifies a completely universal struggle with some benign suggestions for how to cope, the compassionless monsters arrive and prove their fears totally accurate. Stop it. People who can afford help are blessed with the opportunity to engage in self care. Wouldn't it be more productive to look at those who can't afford it and contemplate how we can help them have those moments of sanity? That is what a tribe does. They don't tell someone to quit whining. You are doing the best you can!
That is what neoliberalism does to us. It's all about making the right choices and if you can't cope you chose wrong. Nobody is responsible but you. Collective responsibility has gone. Actually it is villified. But you keep voting in Tories. Now that is a really wrong choice.